A handwritten note by Husband.
I wish there was a loan facility available for marriage,
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And
On not paying the installment, banks would seize the wife!
New style dhamki by Biwi
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Tum jitna time Facebook / Whatsapp ko doge,
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main utna time jabong, flipkart, Amazon ko
dungi...
Poem on "TAJMAHAL"By 3 different People...
1) BACHELOR: "Takdir hai magar kismat nahi khulti,Taj Mahal banana chahta hoon, Magar Mumtaz nahi MILTI"..!!
2) LOVER: "Takdir hai magar kismat nahi khulti,Mumtaz mil gayi hai,Magar Shadi nahi KARTI"...
3) MARRIED: "Takdir hai magar kismat nahi khulti, Mahal banana chahta hoon,Magar Mumtaz nahi MARTI"...!!!
Rishta wohi.. Soch nayi..
BEFORE: You take my breath away.
AFTER: I feel like I'm suffocating.
BEFORE: She says she loves the way I take control of the situation.
AFTER: She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac.
BEFORE: He makes me feel like a million dollars.
AFTER: If I had a dime for every stupid thing he's done...
BEFORE: The Sound of Music.
AFTER: The Sound of Silence.
BEFORE: It's like I'm in a dream.
AFTER: It's like he's in a dorm.
BEFORE: We agree on everything!
AFTER: Doesn't she have a mind of her own?
BEFORE: Charming and Noble.
AFTER: Chernobyl.
BEFORE: Ideal.
AFTER: Idle.
BEFORE: I love a woman with curves.
AFTER: I never said you were fat.
BEFORE: He's completely lost without me.
AFTER: Why won't he ever ask for directions?
BEFORE: Time stood still.
AFTER: This relationship is going nowhere.
BEFORE: Blind.
AFTER: Nearsighted.
BEFORE: You look so seductive in black.
AFTER: Your clothes are so depressing.
BEFORE: I can hardly believe we found each other.
AFTER: I can't believe I ended up with someone like you.
Wife (angrily) -
I don't believe this...
u forgot my birthday again??
How can you do this...
Husband - how can you expect me to remember
your birthday when u never look older..
Wife (clear her throat and smile) -
jaanu Sacchi
Husband in his mind (sahi time pe dialogue aa gya
beta...
warna khatam tha tu aaj)..
Shadi ki 14th Anniversary par....
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Husband gehri soch me tha.
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Wife ne ye dekha aur pucha - Kya soch rahe ho ji
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Husband- Yaad hai jab tumhare daddy ne date pe pakda tha.
aur kaha tha, ya to meri beti se shadi karo ya 14 saal k liye jail jao.
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Wife muskurate hue :- Haan to ?
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Husband :- agar sahi faisla Liya hota to aaj mai azaad ho jata.
Wife casually calls husband at office one afternoon:
Husband : Hi, kaisi ho?
Wife : Theek hun.
Husband : Aaj kya khaya lunch mein?
Wife : Tumhe bas yehi batein karni aati hain,
kya khaya, kuan sa serial dekha, kaun sa song suna....
Husband : Oh!! Ok Ok, ye batao ki how shuld RBI fight these inflationary trends with minimum intervention in the money markets?
Wife : (after few seconds silence).... daal chawal khaye hain, dahi aur salad bhi tha..
Purane Log Kehte Tha Sote Waqt,
Tension Me Nahi Sona Chahiye,
Aashcharya Ki Baat Hai Fir Bhi Log,
Biwi Ke Paas Kese So Jaate Hain…
Wife: Sunoji Ladka bahut paise udaane laga hai.
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Jahan bhi chupati hoon, dhoondh leta hai Husband:
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haramkhor ki book me rakh de, exam tak nahi dhundh Payega...
